Greetings my dear friends.
It has been a while since last we spoke. I have been dreadfully remiss in keeping up with any of my social media accounts of late- this blog has been neglected the most. While I have a list of excuse and complaints as to why, I will only share a few with you at this time.
It seems that the main reason has simply been that I don’t know how to begin. have all these grand plans and ideas in my head that never seem to be released into reality. There is this thing known as imposter syndrome- the idea that you think you don’t deserve to have the same level of success as someone else. And for me, it has been crippling in the sense that it hasn’t allowed my creativity to be what is can or should be. I also have a certain level of anxiety with it as I struggle to feel like there is a place for me in the realm. I often get stuck on “Someone else has already done this” or “I have to find tight niche I can share with too many sides to who I am to decide.” I know it may seem silly to some to say this. However, it has made me stop before even begin. This isn’t what I want.
I have seen many of my favorite content creators struggle with this- each in their own way. Some niche down to please the algorithm, some stick to what they want from the experience to find their people and I have seen some who succumb to the overwhelm and stop entirely. In my heart, I want to follow the second option, but the latter seems to grab on and is hard to shake. I don’t know if it is the thought of trying to do it all, or the crippling fear of what will happen if I am successful in finding my people.
I have asked myself many times in the past weeks or so- “what if you succeed? Would it be so bad if you were successful and happy?” The short answer is no. I would be so bad to find a group of people who enjoyed life in the same way. I have seen it happen with some of the online communities I am a part of. This has encouraged me to begin- then the nagging voice in the bac of my head starts in and the doubt spreads. This is the point at which I crawl back into my cave of doubt and struggle to reemerge. Now is the time to stop that cycle and move on to doing something to bring happiness to myself! The question is- how?
I have decided I need to just start somewhere and see where it goes. (That seems to be how it has gone for many of the creators I follow, in ways they never expected.) I have had a general idea of what to do or a long time. Now it is time to take it from being a dream to being a reality. To kick things off, I plan on participating in the wonderful platform wide Little Women Holiday collab being hosted on Instagram and Youtube. I will be extending my participation to the blog as well. This collab is meant to include food, wardrobe, lifestyle, etc. I feel like it will be the perfect opportunity to introduce myself properly and the concept I will be embracing. I hope you will return to see how it unfolds. I also encourage you to join me on Instagram and YouTube for more.
Faithfully yours,
Ms. B
